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Saturday, July 7, 2018

Letters From My Father 1964-1985

July 4 2018
Dad's letters to me
Back in the Winter during a power outage brought on by a Nor Easter storm ripping through here 3 times I sorted stuff. Part of that stuff was letters from my father.
My parents were divorced in 1964. My father left Cape Cod and moved back to Pennsylvania in 1965 he died in 1985. I never saw him after 1965.
After doing that sorting I made note of his different mail address for 20 years.  Just yesterday I entered that in my tree on ancestry. I promised myself when I felt strong I would reread these letters. Well nothing like Independence Day to do just that. Doesn't mean I feel stronger just have nothing better to do on a hot day, sun too strong for me.

Doing research on people and  my family tree sure has brought forth a lot of interesting things and made for a better understanding of people in general.

Well  tea ready and I sit here sorting by date. Even that was tough. Ran across greeting cards with no dates. Brutal. I actually have saved two copies of letters I sent to him! Amazing I did not make copies of all my correspondence but ,well.
I will try to have my comments in italics,
the rest is excerpts from the letters

So here we go.
1964- 1969
too difficult to keep them in total order I am sure it doesn't matter much as they will have an impact anyway.
Sept 1967 looks like he is living with his brother.
oh yikes it is a letter from his brother Bill telling me that a letter and a post card I sent to Rene was still there. Bill hadn't seen him much and he had to tell him to move out because of his drinking. Then as Bill said miracle of miracles he stopped drinking. He  still had not been by to pick up his mail. Oh and Bill mentions that Rene may not be by because Rene owes Bill money.

LOL


**
February 1965
okay this one is warning me that if I do not get mail it is because Jack or Mom intercepted it.
LOL I have had my own mail box address for YEARS. 
 Then he goes on to tell me that the police and neighbor's have kept him informed on what is going on up here.
oh great like that is reliable!
Then he talks about Jer and I going to Pennsylvania and to contact Gersh Hall and have custody reversed.
oh dear.
**
March 13 1965

Now this was gossipy. Talking about Gary Hacket's ex wife being picked up by Alvin Davis. Dad worked across the street from where she lived and saw the goings on.! LOL Also apparently Jack had accused Mom of playing footsie with Alvin.

then saying he's not a preacher but there is a god   you can see it around you- not that I have to believe in Jesus Christ.  
I have to laugh at this. I have been an  atheist since I was 10 yers old . LOL
Then speaking of moving back to Philadelphia where he was born and raised and referring to Saint John's Settlement House in the back of Temple University.

Back to practicing the fiddle

***
April 1965

I guess I wrote that I was unhappy- big surprise a teenager being unhappy. His advice was get a job  and
wonder why he advised that I use Mom's typewriter????
He thinks I would be happier around a big city. Roger apparently thinks differently
ah George Hall and advice about Mom's engagement ring. That I should have it if Mom isn'y using it and that the ring is legally Rene's  etc.
oh boy
A note at the end I could cut off and give to George if he has the rings.

***
April  19 1965

He is sending me writing paper and stamps. He has a job at Harvest House as a baker

**
April 20 either 1965 0r  1968
Talk of his unemployment benefits and starting his new job as a baker and how he will be sending more money etc. Then telling me he put 7,000 miles on his car looking for work  and the roof is ragged.

wow he  visits the farm where he summered as a child he mentions how it should be left to me and Jerry. He mentions the name Henry  and McEwensville and mentions Grace the woman his mother was named after.
Amazing as I was researching Grace Elliott it was fascinating- she married late in life and died young. For my father to be mentioning hr husband Henry in 1965 and I found out about them in 2015
all this and more written on the reverse side of his resume.

***

April 11 1965

apologizing for being late writing back but busy looking for a job- he failed the physical with republic Steel has prospects with selling VWs or stress testing concrete etc. Talks of Bill and Sarge having company but he felt depressed and  went out for a drive and went up on the mountain behind their home and watched the city lights. He is sending a  microscope to Jerry for his birthday when he figures out how to pack it. I actually  remember this coming in the mail!
***
March 18 1965
Talks of the appeal he has about child support.
in the next breath talking about moving back to Philly where the niggers are and working for Welfare department. The next breath warning me about a 35 year old man driving around the beaches picking up girls like me playing loud music we like etc.

ha ha ha talking about me keeping Jerry interested in school and if I all in love with someone without a college education to keep at him even if i have to bribe him physically.
still laughing.
6,000 miles on his car looking for a job. Brother Bill at Atlantic City on a convention for work.
***
March 15 1965
Denied unemployment benefits from Massachusetts.
ugh
***
October 10 1965
telling me to stick it out at school and ignore Alcock's heckling, and how I can tell the audience when I graduate what a prick Alcock is . Then how no drop outs ever succeed etc. oh dear.
How he was called urine pee pee  and piss for short because of his name and spent 6 years in Summer school
His brother Bill was called Runt and Squirt

Says he sent more to Mom as support hoping to send at least 15 if not 50 unless he gets canned.
Says he still love my mother.

***

September 5 1965

I 'm  45 and know more about men than you'll ever know.

should I even finish reading this I am feeling mighty sarcastic.
Bashing mom because I quit school.
on and on how he helped the schools library etc and how the teachers were behind me 100% and would tutor free. 
ugh too much

He drove past old Springfield house and home has been built on the corner , our house 60 Duncan Lane still has no lawn- too cheap to buy top soil.
um so were we LOL
Advice about Dude etc. makes me wonder what the fuck I wrote about him to my father  good grief.

Town says Jack was no good and they abhorred him  He drove his first wife to suicide etc. But says he ( Jack) should be guilty of murder not her of suicide.

He wishes I would take up with Michael ( meaning Michael Sampson) as he will be on top of the world someday.
He is still waiting for the 200 dollars from Joe Murphy.
***
June 4 1965
ah this one apparently I had complained about Mom & Jack and he tells me there is nothing he can do until I am 18. and to keep the swearing out of letters to him. Avis Elliott would surely put me up. She was Dave Elliott's mother and worked at the Sandpiper.
Talks of getting a loan and opening a donut shop down there.

Cape too small townish for him.
***
November 14 1965   
I must being doing well at school as that is mentioned.

Mini lecture about premarital sex and the bible.
let him know so he can add maternity to the hospitaliztion plan.
what??
He has moved to Koch's Motel in this letter. 15.00 a week kitchen bathroom bedroom and television
He hopes I have been getting the checks as he hasn't heard.

oh boy.
**
November 28 1965
He received my letter and not asking any names just hopes I am in love.
His new job not paying as well and he is late with the checks up here because he has to wait for his paychecks to clear. He is still answering ads in Philadelphia.
He still eats dinner at Bill's and babysits occasionally. He worked even though sick because he is the only one who knows his route. Tells us he has an insurance policy that Jerry and I are to split but do not tell Mom or Jack etc.

She hope Mom hasn't turned Jerry against him.

I remember Jerry's answer distinctly about this! No he did it himself.

oh dear.
He missed my phone call as he was out. Waited at Bill's then went home still feeling sick.
***
October 31 1965
He hasn't heard from me and wondered if I was okay.

I wonder what that was about I usually answered letters promptly. He now has a bank account but waits for the balance to clear before sending anything up here. He hopes I stay in school Have I seen the Comet?
Nice warm weather but before that hell for a breadman  with it cold as hell and raining pitchforks.
Missing us all and would visit but sure he would never leave he is feeling very melancholy.
***
January 28 1966
okay this has got to be the hool as that is mentioned.

Mini lecture about premarital sex and the bible.
let him know so he can add maternity to the hospitaliztion plan.
what??
He has moved to Koch's Motel in this letter. 15.00 a week kitchen bathroom bedroom and television
He hopes I have been getting the checks as he hasn't heard.

oh boy.
**
November 28 1965
He received my letter and not asking any names just hopes I am in love.
His new job not paying as well and he is late with the checks up here because he has to wait for his paychecks to clear. He is still answering ads in Philadelphia.
He still eats dinner at Bill's and babysits occasionally. He worked even though sick because he is the only one who knows his route. Tells us he has an insurance policy that Jerry and I are to split but do not tell Mom or Jack etc.

She hope Mom hasn't turned Jerry against him.

I remember Jerry's answer distinctly about this! No he did it himself.

oh dear.
He missed my phone call as he was out. Waited at Bill's then went home still feeling sick.
***
October 31 1965
He hasn't heard from me and wondered if I was okay.

I wonder what that was about I usually answered letters promptly. He now has a bank account but waits for the balance to clear before sending anything up here. He hopes I stay in school Have I seen the Comet?
Nice warm weather but before that hell for a breadman  with it cold as hell and raining pitchforks.
Missing us all and would visit but sure he would never leave he is feeling very melancholy.
***
January 28 1966
okay this has got to be the saddest one so far.
saddest one so far.
" I was tickled pink to hear from Jerry finally. I waited almost a year. I was frantic thinking you'd maybe forgotten me and the only  thing that keeps me working is thinking of you two."

Bad day on his route- brutal conditions that he compared to being in Germany -4 degrees and never went about 12. He has walking pneumonia

on to how great the German soldier was in discipline and training.
Mentions Jerry's accident- must have been when he fell backwards at the library and split his head open. Dad was glad it wasn't at the bowling alley. And glad the microscope helped with the science fair.
Tells of how his classmate's would threaten to beat him up if he took his violin home...

he is sorry to hear I quit school.
asks if I still have my sewer clogger or do I shave now. adds- see I remember the old days.

it was a filter clogger not a sewer clogger.
oh dear.
January 3 I imagine 1965 no year date.

Taking off for Pennsylvania, not going off to get married either ( my mother married Jack Dec 24 1964)
Headed for W Newton to see a girl he hasn't seen since 1937. I wonder if it was Marion Beasley. Still living with her parents.
Headed to the refinery first then to Bill's if he cannot land a job
Hope we will always keep  in touch and remember him.
Thinking he will lose us both.
***
November 6 1964
Hears I am working at North Port restaurant.
 I never worked there. I was working at Ron's Sandwich shop maybe.
Still doesn't approve of me quitting school. And I must have mentioned I wanted to join the service- he did not like that as we were in the 25 year cycle for wars and he would never see me again. Then he ends with an address for  Colonel Barbara Bishop.

***
note no date that he is still waiting for unemployment benefits of 3 weeks and wants me to give the check to Mom. Training for a sales job that would pay 15,000 a year.
***
April 26 196??? 4 or 8
starts: hope you will read this letter with understanding
I love you as only a father can love his daughter.

talks about suppressing emotions and self destruction.
Spent money on stoves etc because he knew I was a good cook.
Paid for ballet lessons but after a while checked on my progress and stopped those. I am definitely not agile.
NEWS FLASH PARENTS THE WORLD OVER- BALLET IS NOT ABOUT BEING AGILE
**
letter I sent him November 1967 returned no forward address.
**
January 11 1967
birthday card
August 1965
I must have sent a letter asking for employment, hand written rejection telling me to go back to school
sign J H Schertle

I have no clue who that is. no return address on envelope.
***
March 2 1965
glad to receive  my letter as he was down - no more unemployment from Massachusetts.
More advice about Dude and his father and that the gossip is Alvin is running around with Gary Hacket's ex wife.
Walter Love's son- he's one the girls have to watch for- just like his father.
Talks of the rumor of Jack's youngest daughter playing the town ( meaning sleeping with everyone) and that is why she was staying at her aunts and under a psychiatrist's care. Discusses my statement of never wanting to marry and he thinks it is because of the environment and not to  marry because I am bored. Find out his interests and if he makes a pass on first date- not for you.
I should start going to church again He is back to going to church again hadn't been since 1958.
Dan thinks when Rene leaves each day he is coming back here. Dan is 4 years old at this time.
***
May 26 1965
at last mentions Marion Beasley married to a Charles Ellis. 6 children

ELLIS
MARIAN B., on May 24, 2008, of West Grove, formerly of Drexel Hill. Wife of Charles S. Ellis, Jr. Surv. by 6 children, Katherine J. McClatchy, Charles S. Ellis III, Sarah L. Lester, Robert F. Ellis, Dr. Christine Ellis, and Joseph J. Ellis; 17 grandchildren; 7 great-grandchildren; sister Kathryn Lawley of Drexel Hill. Mass of Christian Burial 11 A.M. Tues., May 27 at Assumption BVM Church, 300 State Rd., West Grove. Friends may call at church after 10 A.M. Interment private. EDWARD L. COLLINS FUNERAL HOME, INC., OXFORD. 610-932-9584
Published on Philly.com on May 26, 2008
Marian B Ellis

United States Social Security Death Index
    birth:
10 January 1922
death:
24 May 2008
West grove, Chester, Pennsylvania

   
Birthplace
Joseph J Beasley     Head     M     46     Pennsylvania
Kathryn C Beasley     Wife     F     44     New Jersey
Joseph J Beasley     Son     M     23     Pennsylvania
William J Beasley     Son     M     21     Pennsylvania
Edward J Beasley     Son     M     19     Pennsylvania
Catharine C Beasley     Daughter     F     15     Pennsylvania
Robert E Beasley     Son     M     13     Pennsylvania
Marian Beasley     Daughter     F     8     Pennsylvania
Charles H Beasley     Father     M     89     Virginia
 mentions Jer's science fair project getting a B. Nancy Weintz, Clem Eldredge etc on the school committee.
Mentions playing the violin- fiddle after 20 years- Mozart Violin  concerto  and Kreutzer etudes.
Mentions Alvin Davis attempting suicide. Clem Eldredge was apparently a gossip monger who told my father that Alvin's first wife was  screwing everything.
 ugh small towns.
**
 May 2 1965
Kind of repetitious glad Jerry liked the microscope then tells me there is no danger in handling  dead animals and dissecting them. And he hopes I get interested in something like it.
Science was always my favorite subject makes me wonder if parents pay attention at all! LOL
He hopes my nerves clear up- his cleared up when he left the Cape
He plays violin with Bill and other friends I believe piano and organ. I know Bill played organ in churches.

They all have a hell of a good time.
He is sitting in his car while his wash is getting done and asks if I have gotten my license yet.
I got a learner's permit when I was 16. That lapsed because I had no money. Got a license July 5 1985.
**
January 20 1965.
Glad to hear from me on my birthday- did I get my card.

Bill and Sarge bought him new dress shoes had his clothes cleaned and pressed and shirts ironed. Thanks me for the shirt I sent him for Christmas.
It was snowing when he left the Cape- 2 inches in Providence. He was going to stop by and see Dot and Hope but the weather looked too bad. 7 inches by the time he got to George Washington Bridge.
He is proud of how I express myself in words. And mentions that John Elliott thought a lot of my talent.
 Probably made that up but if true would have been nice for the teacher to tell me that. 
Ah  he did not stop to see Charlotte Thornbury in West Newton as planned. When he mentioned that in one of the first letters no name came up. I will investigate that.
https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/171184250/charlotte-rae-thornbury

Charlotte R Thornbury

United States Social Security Death Index
    birth:
19 November 1920
death:
25 September 2005
Middlesex, Massachusetts
 Of West Newton died Sunday, September 25, 2005 quietly in her home where she had lived with her family since the 1940's. A graduate of Sullins College and University of Pennsylvania, Miss Thornbury was very active in Newton republican politics, as well as state and national campaigns. A longtime member and past president of the Newton Women's Republican Club, attending presidential nominating conventions, working tirelessly on elections, carrying a sign, or helping at the polling places. She devoted years of service to the process of politics and enjoyed traveling to Europe and the British Isles. Miss Thornbury is survived by two sisters-in-law, nieces and nephews, grand nieces and grand nephews. A beloved Aunt who was a month away from her 85th birthday. She was predeceased by her parents, Dudley and Ora (Burson) Thornbury and her brothers Donald A. and William E. Thornbury. A Memorial Service will be held at the Newton Cemetery Chapel, 791 Walnut St., NEWTON, Friday, September 30, 2005 at 2 pm. Blackington, Conroy & Hayes (800) 585-6939
^^^ the above is part of a six page letter written on notebook paper- I should have finished it last night as now it is confusing picking up where I left off!

so
ah touches on why he was mad at Gulf? blames Mom for not going to Gulf functions. blah blah blah she was like a milestone around his neck.
I remember Mom reading this and laughing about the milestone part.

when he gets a job he will get an apartment and we are welcome to visit.

bashing mom for a paragraph. ugh


***
January 2 1967
another 4 sides of notebook paper. sorry he has taken so long to answer letters. He hasn't even seen his brother in 2 months and had 2 heart attacks since Thanksgiving that landed him in the hospital with no way to pay afterwards since he is still out of work

Mentioned Dr Paden dying. Asked about Dot and children. Saying he is not sending anymore money to mom.

Hershey bakery went out of business 2 weeks after he quit them and they owed him 151.00 and said that he owed it to them.
oh dear
on and on about other women like Mom who bled their husbands and stole their bank accounts.
Mentions Bill Ohman and whether he got back with his wife.
How Bill had shorthand notes of conversations of phone calls from mom to both Bill and Grace.

gotta laugh after 4 pages of bashing he says he hopes he sees us soon , us meaning me and Jerry Love Dad
just kind of funny now- probably infuriated me back then or made me cry

***
January 13 1965
postcard from Harrisburg saying how it snowed when he left Chatham etc.
***
August 1966
letter I wrote him to the Grayson address returned.

***
Decemeber 16 1969
long letter and card returned that Jer & I sent to him
***
December 6 1965
Letter from him  with enclosure of
URGENT
we have a top flight position that fits your background
from Business mens clearing house in Philadelphia
He is tickled pink that I got on the honor roll. He never did so he says
Hopes I am not falling for Dave Elliott as he is the only male he knows who has a pierced ear. advises against him because of his ego and lying.
***
March 31 1966
He is tired and it is only 6:20pm wishes he had stayed in the donut business it and Gulf would have never burned if he was in charge. He lost a friend at Gulf- punch in and died. All his father's friends are phonies- they never appreciate anything nor reply to his inqueries.
He heard I had German measles.
yes Mom and I did.
Asked if I was pregnant and then goes on to explain his insurance does not cover pregnancy etc.
He has toothaches and hemorrhoids and doesn't know what to do etc He has something to send me for easter. Still wishes I was back in school
He hopes Jerry goes to college and hopes he isn't a draft card burner and then bashes Cassius Clay Then onto States and bible and killing.
He sees children on his route that look like Jer and me except the girl is carrying a violin. He could have taught me- I was his task. etc

***
December 8 1967 or 1969
it is a smudged short message water or tears blotted out the center of it. He has been in and out of hospitals for 3 years with cardiac and pulmonary embolisms. what killed his father. If anything happens to him his brother will let us know. Wishes us a happy new year and merry christmas.

irony- the brother Bill died  in March of 1985 aand Rene died in July of 1985 but cousin Bill is the one who called Mom.
***
Janury 20 1971
 a card to a Honey of a daughter Love Dad
***
April 1970 addressed to Jerry and me
He is depressed and poor and would love to see us but has no car and rarely sees his brother. He cannot even afford bus fare
He hopes everyone  is well . apparently he doesn't know Ma Chrystie died in 1967 as he hoped " Mother and Dad and Roger were okay.
***
November 1972
He resigned from a job he could not walk that far to and now works for Kayo Oil company a gas station 1.60 an hour 7 days a week I really bust my nuts etc and stay drunk most the time when he can afford it. Goes to the American Legion to get drunk. Wishes he could see us before he dies but knows that won't happen. Been without a woman for 4 years one hell of a long time.
to paraphrase.
***
July 6 1972
typed out message to Dad about his prolonged silence.
October 5 1972
He has sat down many time to write but never completed the letters.
His trial comes up  next Tuesday  he may lose his license his car and his job all at once and maybe jail time. Doctor says he has a severe case of diabetes. Not bad enough for insulin though. He wishes Joe Lynam could defend him.
***
July 11 1972

I am not trying to be melodramatic but has newspapers about the flood of the century but no time to send them. Was at his brother's and told I called, he hadn't seen his brother in over a year. Bill Jr goes to take his physical
I assume that means for Vietnam?

Now living with 3 Master Sergeants retired but at the same address as before  6211 Blue Ridge Love to you both Dad Rene.
***
May 13 1972
nothing new , still no money and poor paying job hardly ever sees his brother
so poor and ashamed of himself that he doesn't even try to contact us. He's a little bit drunk  and  asking to excuse his spelling. He wonders if we have married or Jerry changed his name to Cook... living with 4 master sergeants. Remembering the good times and the ballet lessons   and what a flop. but I was a good ice skater. Afraid of going to jail because he cannot raise bail.

again with the ballet = flop
***
November 28 1972
Still at Kayo oil co, 7 days a week walking 3 1/2 miles He has a puppy not his but...
***
October 1972
having trouble getting this out of the  envelope.
Post card of a covered  bridge- lost his license looking for another job will send papers about the flood

I do not remember ever getting the papers but may have and they were lost in a move.
letter:  the police were very courteous his blood alcohol was .247 if it had been .25 he would have been in the morgue. He is drunk writing this and wondering if he can walk the distance to get to his job... the past February he slept on the stage at American Legion for 3 days as there was 18 inches of snow- he fell flat on his face  in front of the house of a friend. Still have my children to hell with the license.
**
July 19 1972
working for Milton H Eshelman Sycamore street in Harrisburg making 2.14 an hour purchases equipment etc
He was sorry to hear about Ma Chrystie they were wonderful people He often wondered about old Dad but ashamed to ask about Ma as she was the one who told  your mother to divorce me. Update on Debbie she remind him of me and Bill will be called up soon and Bobby is retarded and needed special training for driving
He is drunk and at home while writing this as you can tell. He wrote to J Kennard Weaver and cannot remember his wife's name.-
***

just  put his glasses on so the handwriting may get worse, excuse for not writing his love of vodka- some right by his hand now.
Wondering  why Roger and Lori chose Addison as a name it is a fatal disease.

Tells of how Sarge kicked him out because he had the DTs. very drunk then picks up after the drunk wears off he is paying 10.00 a week for court costs and fines. Taking anti abuse pills and says they are not working they are supposed to make you sick and feel like you are having a heart attack. then he talks of the secret meetings gulf had and mama grace calling his father there etc. She thought he was having an affair.
then how he voted the opposite of his father. Norman Thomas & the american ticket John G Schmitz?

well that's disappointing what a total opposite of Norman Thomas
***
July 6 2018
Letters from Father part 2
February 15 1973
oops looks like I am near the goal- and better put these in better date order now the one dated February 15 1973 is chastizing me for using a word and my approach to answering his letter before. Too bad I do not have my reply
 but back to sorting and need a peppermint tea right now.
wow that took a while. Ran across Kancaster County sending me a form to fill out. He had applied for assistance and they have to contact all relatives in case they can help. How humiliating for both sides.

January 16 1973
Living with 5 master sergeants and they all use the same writing pad- he thinks I may be able to see other messages.

no I cannot
Telling me that Jerry should take his hitch in the military- only cowards etc.

Got fired at Kayo Oil, it was raining and he gave out a 20 dollar bill instead of a one for change and hasn't been able to find a job since. The state has to know if we ( Jerry & I ) are emplyed.
He lost a buddy and volunteered to clean at the  Legion. The buddy was employed by Ed Noyes but Rene didn't know until the guy died. Asks about the Smiths Eddie and Maudie, Joe & Muriel. Also asks about the dentist who put up the fence at Hardings Beach Shores.
I haven't lived there since 1965 and hear from no one there.
A friend almost drove him up here. He lives with a bunch of guys and they go to bars and end up in fights over politics and women.
oh joy

******************
January 29 1973

oh my I made a copy of my reply! I  will scan that and add to the blog
January 22 1973
Dear Cynth
at the top says PRIVATE
This may seem pornographic to you...

but destroy it as soon as you read it.

I wouldn't even know how to condense this.

About wanting to get into my pants even when he was changing my diapers as a baby. How he misses me  "you little doll". Nice pair of knockers and beautiful ass. ... give his life just to have me laying beside him. Please come down and I will show you what a good time is. Taken 8 years to understand why my daughter isn't standing along side of me and putting her arms around me.
enough.

then the regular letter dealing with master sergeants and politics, paraphrasing this but  "you and Jerry have a hell of a lot to learn."

asks how Dottie and Char are doing are they still at 260 Onley...

 My rebuttal was February 2 1973 . long and wordy. I do not even care to read it. I feel the same I am sure.
It did put me into a tailspin. I kept fearing that he would show up what would I do? Kill him? what. I went to Dr Whitelaw, he read it and ended up prescribing Librium ( a low dose) which I took until 1996. IF ONLY the doctor had said "It is only words- be strong, you are strong- he is not well"

oh well he didn't.


***********

February 6 1973
two business cards enclosed one signed to me the other to Jerry from Russ Tuckey Ice Follies
Asks about salt bed oysters his roommate says they are dead. Listening to opera so he is quite sober. He explains that he was sober writing the "private" letter but was drinking. He feels it. Sorry that he wrote it but probably true in its context.
The friend still wants to drive him up here. How are Bob and Muriel and is the sailboat still around.
Please forgive me for writing that last letter.
took me about 10 years but forgive and forget and now reading all this again. oh well.
***
February 7 1973
He thought I would react as I did. Then goes on to rehash things and the quitting school issue again. Finding it funny when I called the cops at Kerr lane
it was Duncan lane
then something about  me volunteering to swim Oyster river to get the boat then dragging him out of the water and Bob beating him up. ugh but he was proud of me

good grief me swim that distant without water wings! I don't think so

***
 October 7 1973
an  enclosure of a brochure for
The Gate House
a Halfway House for Recovering Alcoholics

note
Sober and no drinks since May 23 1973
October 14 1973

nice to hear from me after such a long time
Wandering streets ends up in hospital with double pneumonia and they find he has diabetes, they send him to VA for stabilization and now he gives himself a shot each morning and has joined AA. Almost lost his clothes and belongings as they sold the house he was in. Had job at old age home as a custodian.  Hasn't seen the ocean since he left here.

***
Thinking I am reading letters that span almost 20 years. 10 of those years steady communication.  Kind of inspiring.
At the same time I am reading Bunker Hill by Nathaniel Philbrick and Beautiful and the Damned by F Scott Fitzgerald.
really testing the brain cells
October 17 1973
a letter from me to him either a copy or what- explaining that it was handwritten not typed because the typewriter was under news clippings etc.
**
Still working at Luther acres and doing television repairs and AA meetings.  He can get his license back but the insurance is high
***
December 9 1973
 a letter with photos from an AA picnic




He will be sending money but no more cash because of the Christmas rush. He is not worried about his license and will not buy gas as it is an artificial shortage.
Running around with a 32 year old nurse right now. Two of the 19 year old waitresses wondered how he felt about someone only 5 years older than him dropping dead.- The accountant dropped dead at the house. the guy who died was 39 they thought dad was 34.
goes on a jew hating rant.

going back to the house to clean the hood flue.
The repairman they had for televisions went and drank too much had the dts and they rushed him to the VA hospital, he is okay now but not allowed back in the house. They declared bankruptcy on the business and folded.
**
December 19 1973
Christmas card to a "Sweetheart"
**
Letter with news clipping about Gate House playing Santa
he has a date with the nurse again
wishes me a merry christmas and sent Burr.

**
July 7 2018
finally completed reading. But as I was clearing off the computer desk here noticed I missed a couple so I will tackle those in a bit they are from the 80s as well.
***
Letters to me from Rene part 3
January 5 1974
Spent a sober new years eve which he does not appreciate.
His girlfriend drove him down to Shartlesville PA and he paid for dinner neither of them drank even though all around them were drinking this was New Years Day. They spent most of the afternoon and evening with Bill and Sarge
Going to her girl friend's house for spaghetti dinner. All but one of his roommates have moved out so he has no one to drop him off.
Blood sugar way up feeling dizzy and faint.
**
January 11 1974
snow sleet rain lousy weather there too. Glad we  get the money orders he was worried we could not cash them.
Cannot see the comet as the skies have not been clear.
Hope I enjoy Burr as much as he is enjoying the two books I sent down.

wonder what I sent???
His brother Bill heard from Bob Mortonson for the first time in years over Christmas. Mrs Mortonson has been bedridden for over a year now, that's all Bob told him

***
January 17 1974
birthday card
***
January 15 1974

He missed an AA meeting as there is only one car for 14 people.
Hopes I have a happy birthday and loves getting my letters he saves them for future reference.

they were in a metal check box so he says I wonder what happened to them?

He keeps lending money to people and they get drunk and get thrown out of the Gatehouse, he guesses he is stupid.

Books must have been science fiction
***
January 27 1974
He has moved into a new place and the rent is higher he won't be able to send money for me and Jer. He is looking for a better paying job but has no idea where that will be. Job prospects, printing  establishment, chemical plant.

He is living with the young girl friend. separate bed rooms and he has not tried to touch her yet. She is 36 and has had a tough life since she was 5 years old. He has met all her living relatives in the past 3 months and they are all nice. She drove him down to Baltimore to meet her aunt and uncle and that is the first time he has been out of the state since 1966. Her name is Virginia Hufford and she was married back in 1954 but got a divorce as he turned out to be a Momma boy. They have fun running around with her friends and thank goodness none of them drink as he thinks that would kill him this time.

His hands are chapped and dry from the ammonia water he uses cleaning.
Still going to AA meetings A friend from Gatehouse left and he ended up picking him up and getting him a room and sitting with him through the dts. He cracked up his car and is in the hospital now.

At the home they have 9 men and 79 women over 80 years of age
***
August 16 1974
warns me of DES a drug mothers took etc hopes I am getting check ups his girlfriend has a tumor from it. He still hasn't touched her. They should be married by Thanksgiving. He would call but afraid he would get Mom on the phone.

I doubt very much that she would have done or said anything. no clue why I wasn't writing other than Jack and mom separated and Jack sick and died that September

Ginny due for operation September 14 1974

***
February 28 1974
he thought I was teed off at him for not writing sooner
Girlfriend is on the small side but heavy about 5'2" She was a nurses aid at Luther before he worked there. They have a sheepdog that follows him around. Painting the 9' ceiling in his apartment he will have to stand on the top of the ladder to reach. He has hopes of seeing me this Summer (1974?)
June 28 1974
quitjob at Luther and now maintence at Beford shoes and part time custodial jobs
He would have been in the accident  he enclosed news clippings about had he not quit Luther Acres.
wonders why I am not writing.

I wonder too other than it is 1974 and all hell broke loose with Jack.
***
January 18 1975
Birthday Card
 out of work 1 and a half months buying new house 20 Chester Street Lancaster PA

tell Mom  it wasn't the Pez.
***

March 20 1975

wonders why I haven't written- he works in a hosptial 6 days a week and was in the morgue depressing.
Girlfriend has set the date for July 7  her grandmother's birthday.

**
January 16 1978

still wonders why I have not written long letter listing how much he misses and loves all of us- please write please call.

This is so painful to read but I have no clue why I stopped writing.

***
Notes with a self addressed envelope  fired from his job as place was sold long letter on small pieces of note paper.

January 1982

sorry so much time between letters he has trouble with his hands. note inside a birthday card
Bill Bob and Debby send him things Debby sent cookies. He has only spent Christmas 1980 at Bill's. His brother has turned into a real asshole. Arguements over the bible
Tha past 16 years have been hell on earth for him.
Loves the Christmas present and everyone says it looks good on him.
February 10 1984
Valentine's card to me with note inside.
Dear Cynth,
It's been 25 years since you and I went to the Father & Daughter's Girl Scout Banquet together. I never could get enough of taking you out and giving you things. I hope you'll send me your ring size of your third finger of your right hand. Thanks for your Christmas present of 2 years ago, the puzzle you  sent me was also appreciateed in 1972. I got it apart ok and then couldn't get it together again after and went to the hospital. Love always Dad.

***
 January 8 1985 insurance policy for Jerry
***
March 9 1985
He sees I never cashed a check  he can barely write and can barely see.

rehashes why I did not write for so long after the letter of 1972

I think it was 1973

He always loved getting my letters. so newsy
Chelsea is a very pretty little girl

I have often regretted that I didn't write to the 3 of you thinking it would ruin your family. oh well I guess that's all water over the dam

ps I would still love pictures of you and your mother.
I tore up the check and it is with this last letter.
***

His brother Bill died March 29 1985

and we got the phone call from Bill Jr I think on July 15 1985 that my father had died.

Bill Jr thinks he died of a broken heart over his brother Bill dying.
***

I began reading the letters again thinking I had blown the "Private" letter way out of proportion. I had not .It was a real shock emotionally that lasted a long time.  Re reading all of these was so sad. Seeing so many lives touched by alcohol.

I am glad I pursued this and feel comfortable forgiving and forgetting again.

***
now to read the few that were with greeting card pile on this desk. I am about out of tears.
 I think these last three are best scanned.

**
here goes- this was probably the most painful of all of them. I have no clue why I stopped writing. I must have had a reason as I write to just about anyone incessantly!
The very last one of these is the very last letter I received from him January 1985.







well that is it. I am glad I did this in 4 days. I am completely emotionally exhausted.


Saturday, June 30, 2018

Sober Family

Last night late, I was browsing my tree and thought I would work on the Sobers and find death dates for those with blanks. First one was Alexander Jordan Sober. After a little bit of snooping and research I found him in a stack of papers I printed up back in 2002! I guess when I was new to this and had a printer with an endless supply of ink LOL Had wife Sarah Jane Gearhart, two daughters Martha no dates and Stella b 1869. Well I entered them in the tree- no information popped up for the wife Sarah nor for Martha but a death certificate for Stella came up that she died in 1962. wow over 90 years old! I had someone from a group on facebook with RAOGK post the death certificate . Of course it lists parents unknown! Informant Clyde Davis. Has her listed as buried in Mount Vernon Cemetery in Riverside Northumberland Pennsylvania. searched for other Sobers there and Alexander Jordan was there. died in 1876. More research and the wife Sarah claimed veteran pension. But in 1880 the two girls are in an orphan school Mount Joy Soldiers Orphans School in Mount Joy Pennsylvania. I reasoned that Sarah Jane must have died as well before 1880.

so here are the details from censuses and some images. I was able to flesh out Sarah Jane and her parents and brothers and sisters but they do not show up on findagrave.
***
1880 census at Mount Joy
1880 Schedules of Defective,Dependent and Deliinquent classes.
Household
   
Role
   
Sex
   
Age
   
Birthplace
Annie L Satezahm     Other     F     15     Pennsylvania, United States
Amos Steele     Other     M     10     Pennsylvania, United States
Heny Sourbeer     Other     M     10     Pennsylvania, United States
William Sourbeer     Other     M     12     Pennsylvania, United States
Hellen Siple     Other     F     10     Pennsylvania, United States
Henry M Shaar     Other     M     10     Pennsylvania, United States
William N Shaar     Other     M     11     Pennsylvania, United States
Grace F Sober     Other     F     10     Pennsylvania, United States
Eliza Schweitzer     Other     F     9     Pennsylvania, United States
Stella Sober     Other     F     11     Pennsylvania, United States
Martha G Sober     Other     F     12     Pennsylvania, United States
Robert D Smith     Other     M     12     Pennsylvania, United States
Annie Schweitzer     Other     F     6     Pennsylvania, United States
Laura E Sheaffer     Other     F     10     Pennsylvania, United States
Margaret A Shears     Other     F     8     Pennsylvania, United States
Sam W Sierfred     Other     M     13     Pennsylvania, United States
George H Sierfred     Other     M     9     Pennsylvania, United States
Willi C Thomas     Other     M     11     Pennsylvania, United States
Heister L Thomas     Other     M     10     Pennsylvania, United States
Charles H Thomas     Other     M     12     Pennsylvania, United States
Citing this Record

"United States Census, 1880," database with images, FamilySearch (https://familysearch.org/ark:/61903/1:1:MWFY-8BJ : 15 July 2017), Stella Sober in household of Annie L Satezahm, Mount Joy, Lancaster, Pennsylvania, United States; citing enumeration district ED 133, sheet 266B, NARA microfilm publication T9 (Washington D.C.: National Archives and Records Administration, n.d.), roll 1141; FHL microfilm 1,255,141.

View the original document. The original may contain more information than was indexed.
United States Census, 1880
District     ED 133
Sheet Number and Letter     266B
Household ID     9824658
Affiliate Name     The U.S. National Archives and Records Administration (NARA)
Affiliate Publication Number     T9
Affiliate Film Number     1141
GS Film Number     1255141
Digital Folder Number     005162260
***
1910 Martha and Stella with a servant, a boarder and 2 hired hands.
1910
Name     Stella Sober
Event Type     Census
Event Date     1910
Event Place     Middle Paxton, Dauphin, Pennsylvania, United States
Gender     Female
Age     40
Marital Status     Single
Race     White
Race (Original)     White
Relationship to Head of Household     Sister
Relationship to Head of Household (Original)     Sister
Birth Year (Estimated)     1870
Birthplace     Pennsylvania
Father's Birthplace     Pennsylvania
Mother's Birthplace     Pennsylvania
Sheet Letter     A
Sheet Number     3
Household
   
Role
   
Sex
   
Age
   
Birthplace
Martha Sober     Head     F     42     Pennsylvania
Stella Sober     Sister     F     40     Pennsylvania
Clara Nagle     Servant     F     45     Pennsylvania
Ross Nagle     Boarder     M     8     Pennsylvania
Charles Vaudling     Hired man     M     23     Pennsylvania
George Vaudling     Hired man     M     18     Pennsylvania
Citing this Record

"United States Census, 1910," database with images, FamilySearch (https://familysearch.org/ark:/61903/1:1:MGHT-XS7 : accessed 30 June 2018), Stella Sober in household of Martha Sober, Middle Paxton, Dauphin, Pennsylvania, United States; citing enumeration district (ED) ED 103, sheet 3A, family 46, NARA microfilm publication T624 (Washington D.C.: National Archives and Records Administration, 1982), roll 1337; FHL microfilm 1,375,350.

View the original document. The original may contain more information than was indexed.
United States Census, 1910
District     ED 103
Sheet Number and Letter     3A
Household ID     46
Affiliate Name     The U.S. National Archives and Records Administration (NARA)
Affiliate Publication Number     T624
Affiliate Film Number     1337
GS Film Number     1375350
Digital Folder Number     004973404
Image Number     00732

***
1920 Stella at the bottom of a page alone no details.

1920
Stella at bottom of page not sure if Martha's name is faded at top or not
Name     Stella Sober
Event Type     Census
Event Date     1920
Event Place     Harrisburg Ward 4, Dauphin, Pennsylvania, United States
Gender     Female
Age     50
Marital Status     Single
Race     White
Race (Original)     White
Can Read     Yes
Can Write     Yes
Relationship to Head of Household     Sister
Relationship to Head of Household (Original)     Sister
Birth Year (Estimated)     1870
Birthplace     Pennsylvania
Father's Birthplace     Pennsylvania
Mother's Birthplace     Pennsylvania
Sheet Letter     B
Sheet Number     7
Citing this Record

"United States Census, 1920," database with images, FamilySearch (https://familysearch.org/ark:/61903/1:1:MFRK-FG3 : accessed 30 June 2018), Stella Sober, Harrisburg Ward 4, Dauphin, Pennsylvania, United States; citing ED 69, sheet 7B, line 98, family 33, NARA microfilm publication T625 (Washington D.C.: National Archives and Records Administration, 1992), roll 1559; FHL microfilm 1,821,559.


so I search for martha alone and get this
1920 census
Name     Martha Sober
Event Type     Census
Event Date     1920
Event Place     Harrisburg Ward 4, Dauphin, Pennsylvania, United States
Gender     Female
Age     52
Marital Status     Single
Race     White
Race (Original)     White
Can Read     Yes
Can Write     Yes
Relationship to Head of Household     Head
Relationship to Head of Household (Original)     Head
Own or Rent     Rent
Birth Year (Estimated)     1868
Birthplace     Pennsylvania
Father's Birthplace     Pennsylvania
Mother's Birthplace     Pennsylvania
Sheet Letter     A
Sheet Number     2
Citing this Record

"United States Census, 1920," database with images, FamilySearch (https://familysearch.org/ark:/61903/1:1:MFRK-GDF : accessed 30 June 2018), Martha Sober, Harrisburg Ward 4, Dauphin, Pennsylvania, United States; citing ED 69, sheet 2A, line 14, family 33, NARA microfilm publication T625 (Washington D.C.: National Archives and Records Administration, 1992), roll 1559; FHL microfilm 1,821,559.

***
1930 I find them both together with a servant William Crabbe

1930

Stella B Sober
United States Census, 1930
Name     Stella B Sober
Event Type     Census
Event Date     1930
Event Place     Middle Paxton, Dauphin, Pennsylvania, United States
Gender     Female
Age     61
Marital Status     Single
Race     White
Race (Original)     White
Relationship to Head of Household     Head
Relationship to Head of Household (Original)     Head
Birth Year (Estimated)     1869
Birthplace     Pennsylvania
Father's Birthplace     Pennsylvania
Mother's Birthplace     Pennsylvania
Sheet Letter     A
Sheet Number     12
Household
   
Role
   
Sex
   
Age
   
Birthplace
Stella B Sober     Head     F     61     Pennsylvania
Martha G Sober     Sister     F     62     Pennsylvania
William Crabb     Servant     M     62     Pennsylvania
Citing this Record

"United States Census, 1930," database with images, FamilySearch (https://familysearch.org/ark:/61903/1:1:XHSQ-631 : accessed 30 June 2018), Stella B Sober, Middle Paxton, Dauphin, Pennsylvania, United States; citing enumeration district (ED) ED 78, sheet 12A, line 15, family 272, NARA microfilm publication T626 (Washington D.C.: National Archives and Records Administration, 2002), roll 2027; FHL microfilm 2,341,761.

***
1940 they are together alone
1940
Name     Martha G Sober
Event Type     Census
Event Date     1940
Event Place     Middle Paxton Township, Dauphin, Pennsylvania, United States
Sex     Female
Age     70
Marital Status     Single
Race (Original)     White
Race     White
Relationship to Head of Household (Original)     Head
Relationship to Head of Household     Head
Birthplace     Pennsylvania
Birth Year (Estimated)     1870
Last Place of Residence     Same House
Household
   
Role
   
Sex
   
Age
   
Birthplace
Martha G Sober     Head     F     70     Pennsylvania
Stella B Sober     Sister     F     68     Pennsylvania
Citing this Record

"United States Census, 1940," database with images, FamilySearch (https://familysearch.org/ark:/61903/1:1:KQ8P-C5J : accessed 30 June 2018), Martha G Sober, Middle Paxton Township, Dauphin, Pennsylvania, United States; citing enumeration district (ED) 22-92, sheet 19B, line 44, family 389, Sixteenth Census of the United States, 1940, NARA digital publication T627. Records of the Bureau of the Census, 1790 - 2007, RG 29. Washington, D.C.: National Archives and Records Administration, 2012, roll 3484.

***

so then I look for more details on the father Alexander Jordan Sober
Civil War veteran and Sarah J applying for pension in 1877

Civil War Alexander Jordan Sober
Name     Jordan Sober
Also Known As Name     Alexander J. Sober
Event Type     Military Service
Military Beginning Rank     Private
Military Final Rank     Corporal
Military Side     Union
State or Military Term     Pennsylvania
Military Unit     52nd Regiment, Pennsylvania Infantry
Military Company     D
Note     Original filed under Alexander J./Sober
Affiliate Film Number     115
Citing this Record

"United States Civil War Soldiers Index, 1861-1865," database, FamilySearch (https://familysearch.org/ark:/61903/1:1:FSS1-XYD : 4 December 2014), Jordan Sober, Corporal, Company D, 52nd Regiment, Pennsylvania Infantry, Union; citing NARA microfilm publication M554 (Washington D.C.: National Archives and Records Administration, n.d.), roll 115; FHL microfilm 882,450.


1877 alexander sarah widow file-

Alexander J Sober
United States General Index to Pension Files
Name     Alexander J Sober
Event Type     Pension
Event Date     1871
Beneficiary's Name     Sarah J Sober

***
Finally find something with Sarah and her many family members
1850 census Originally she was listed with birth year 1850 so that stymied searches for a bit until I wised up!

1850
Sarah Gearhart
United States Census, 1850
Name     Sarah Gearhart
Event Type     Census
Event Year     1850
Event Place     Packer, Carbon, Pennsylvania, United States
Gender     Female
Age     2
Race     White
Birth Year (Estimated)     1848
Birthplace     Pennsylvania
House Number     27
Household
   
Role
   
Sex
   
Age
   
Birthplace
Joel Gearhart         M     34     Pennsylvania
Matilda Gearhart         F     30     Pennsylvania
Levi Gearhart         M     12     Pennsylvania
Harriet Gearhart         F     10     Pennsylvania
William Gearhart         M     9     Pennsylvania
Daniel Gearhart         M     7     Pennsylvania
James Gearhart         M     6     Pennsylvania
Martha Gearhart         F     5     Pennsylvania
Sarah Gearhart         F     2     Pennsylvania
Lewis Gearhart         M     1     Pennsylvania
Aaron Wetzell         M     25     Pennsylvania
Citing this Record

"United States Census, 1850," database with images, FamilySearch (https://familysearch.org/ark:/61903/1:1:M44Y-L73 : 12 April 2016), Sarah Gearhart in household of Joel Gearhart, Packer, Carbon, Pennsylvania, United States; citing family 27, NARA microfilm publication M432 (Washington, D.C.: National Archives and Records Administration, n.d.).

There are Wetzels in my tree as well wondering if Aaron is related.

that for some other day

here are the documents

Stella Sober Death certificate

Stella and Martha in Orphans School
1880
 no census for 1890 of course those were lost in a fire, but none for 1900 either.

1910


1920 Martha 513 N Second Street Harrisburg
line 14

Stella on another page at the bottom 1920 census


1930 census


1940 census


father's war pension

Martha's death certificate 1942


Two news items after Martha's death




***
that's it for now no children born to Martha or Stella that I know of.

Monday, June 4, 2018

Favors

A few days ago I was contacted by an acquaintance to drive him back from an eye appointment  in Mashpee. I asked what time? appointment was 2 pm. So, many messages back and forth it was agreed he would pick me up here at 12:45pm to give plenty of time for traffic.

Day arrives and it is pouring rain. I am mulling over all the worst case scenarios and the solutions. Even down to renting a car here and driving over to pick him up. I planned on stopping at AC Moore while he was at Home Depot or Jo Ann Fabrics while he was in Perry's for fire extinguishers.  He did the Home Depot thing last night so.
It was agreed he would drive down and I would drive back and that I could choose the route to take back. ha ha ha

I messaged him this morning to make sure the driver's seat was easily adjustable- I am 5'4" he is 6'7". Funny response from him- yes the springs are broken but if you grab a hold of the steering wheel you should be able to do it. Last guy that drove his car was short like you and had no problem.
No offer to adjust the seat for me. ha ha ha.

12:30pm the parking lot below was full of cars and obstacles. 12:40pm the parking lot was pretty much empty. A woman backing out almost ran me down not expecting a pedestrian there. So I got ready and stood out by my mailbox. The tree protected me from the down pour. He was on time but did not see me so I had to walk back to his car that speedily made it next to mine parked there. ugh.

I  put my fleece blanket down on the seat get in and struggle with the seat belt and off we go. I tried to encourage him to take the back roads to 6A and then a left onto rt 130. He would have none of that. Took back roads to Station Avenue and took Mid Cape from there. Taking the exit 5 for 149 then rt 28. I see Botellos and know we are almost there. It is 1:40pm. A bit of small talk then he decided to go in at 1:50pm just in case he has to fill out forms.

I say I will stay in the car. I know if I sit in a waiting room with someone I may fart just to get out of there.

I had my Kindle. Wished I had brought knitting and my Fire 7 just in case they had wifi.

So rain pelting the windshield. I read a bit, I feel cold. Glad I wore layers anyhow but wished I had worn my Winter jacket.

The hand brake was on and kept hitting my elbow. Or I it. LOL

People watched a bit. wow every shape size and color and attitude went in and out of that office. Some of it amusing. One guy talking to himself or had earphone and was on his phone was so huge I thought he would never fit through the doorway. Shorts on a nice shirt and sneakers. I sit there freezing my ass off.

women in and out. One showed up alone and stood there. A cigarette in hand. A man came up to her- he looked like an EMT and assured her this is where she had an appointment. She smoked this butt and it was long!  Short puffs little smoke. about less than half down and flicks it to the ground and stomps it out. what!?

Time drags on I check my phone clock seems like every 7 minutes. It is almost 3pm and I get optimistic that he will come down the ramp soon.  3:30 pm still no show. I begin to wonder if he is in some room waiting and forgotten by the staff.  I grab my bag and head to the door. Two women struggling down the hall to the door so I hold the door. They inch on out- the older of the two has a walker with tennis balls on the two back legs. I hustle on into the office look around and do not see him. I ask the clerk and she says he just went in the office. JUST? I said incredulously.. oh brother. So I head out to he car to read some more. But the walker and the other woman are standing there in the rain having navigation problems. I offer to help. We make some progress. I ask if she wants help getting to her car. She says yes but she will bring the car over- she points to a black car and tells me my "friend" is Chloe! I ask Chloe how the eye appointment went. she says "what? "  your eyes how was the appointment. She wipes her nose and says  "okay I guess"
I totally get that ! LOL

Slow process getting Chloe in the car she cannot hitch herself in and then back in the seat to make the seat belt fit. Seat belt latched and I help her get her arm in the right place and catch my long hair in everything. We laugh. I am thanked and I feel  like I did something and get back in the car in the driver's seat so I can practice directionals etc and adjust the seat and mirror. and read some more. The rain is really coming down now and it is 4pm. All of a sudden I see this youthful body racing down the ramp legs flying. It is him LOL so much for dodging raindrops.

I had the car in D for backing up. He noticed, otherwise I would have taken down that lovely birch tree. LOL no excuses here.

Take  a left out into traffic to get to Hyannis and Perry's. I have lost all interest about Jo Ann Fabrics and I am never asked. We get to Perry's and I turn around and park by the door for him to pick up and pay. He tells me to shut off the car. fucking no way. good grief. So 2 by 2 the extinguishers get in the back and I hope with a sudden stop they do not, all 4 of them, seek out the back of my head.

I take a right out of Perrys to shoot through Sears and then  a right out of the mall near the mattress place. I wanted to take rt 6a back. no no no way do that.  Good grief what happened to me taking the route I want on the way back. But I zip my lip. Take rt 28  ask if he wants to visit his mother's grave- no he was there when he came back from Florida. Thanks. Then to the Old North Main in Bass River South Yarmouth. Then shoot across and take the road that goes by the golf course. More construction. Then Upper County to 28 and back here. The puddle was still huge. I back into a spot here so he does not have to navigate with his eyes so much to get out. He asks if the puddle on the other side is big. yes at least 2 feet deep. But I think why the fuck do you think I came this way? ugh I gather my things and he says "Thank you I wish I could pay you in some way." (Well yeah you said that at the beginning of all this. I expected nothing and guess what! LOL)  then continues " But that fell through" Inside I am laughing. What fell through? Was all that talk about restaurants a hint and when I said I do not eat in restaurants that was out. Or when we talked about where I shop for food and he wondered why not Stop & Shop. And me saying because I do not like the store- that wasn't a good enough excuse.

This was exhausting.

I thought to myself , anyone not totally clueless knows a person, a woman especially, retired and living on social security alone and drives an 18 year old car- offer 5 bucks for crying out loud. even a dollar.

but then  again maybe he doesn't have it.

ugh
next time I will let the sarcasm rip.

pix from today










Tuesday, May 29, 2018

Bunney Family Tree Obituaries

John Goynes Bunney born 1825 in St Cleer, Cornwall, England married Johanna Lowery and a Mary Jane Lowery
Mary Jane's obituary

Sunday, May 27, 2018

2018 Garden

 Gorgeous day on May 26th it was actually hot and my face got some color. Didn't last but hey.
***Warning***
there will be a photo of dog shit at the end. It was so spectacular and unusual I just could not resist. But you have been warned.

The bulb bed I started in 2014 was iffy this year. No tulips other than crinkled yellow leaves and one crushed looking red tulip. The daffodils and narcissus were fine and the grape hyacinths are multiplying but really disappointed in the tulips. That was the whole point LOL
 So I dug them up. They will rest for the Summer and then I will plant them again in that bed in the Autumn.

The I planted wild flower seeds in containers and had enough that I sprinkled a few in the bulb bed where the tulips were. That will be interesting. Cosmos, Flax, Bee mix and a butterfly mix.








My brother's men had cut down a tree earlier in the week and the stump was in the back of the trailer. I asked what was going to happen with it. It smelled divine like cedar. So I got it in the yard below.

So I trimmed ornamental grasses down  so new growth will show. Cut out hydrangea canes and other vines choking through from the other side of the fence. Watered. And was getting pretty hot so I decided to wind things up and go upstairs. All of a sudden a guy comes around the corner. Scared me half to death. creep. He apologized for the scare. I am sure the expression on my face told him fuck off. He wanted to use the water for his boat engine and was headed to MY hose and faucet. So glad I caught this. I said no not this water , you can go out front I will turn that on. The past two years when they have used my hose they have wound the hose sloppily but worse than that they turned off the tap so hard I could barely turn it on and it is hard to shut off now and drips. grrr
So I get out front and go to turn on the water and he says not now later. Okays I tell him to knock on the building or garage door loudly and I will hear it and come down. So he hooks up his hose. I am upstairs and hear him knock "lightly" I open my window and call below that I will be right down. I get down there and he is upstairs by my kitchen door. So fucking impatient. good grief.I turn on the water and go upstairs waiting to hear he is done. Finally yes the engine works and they collect their hose. phew.

so here is the shit. perfect end for that delightful day . Multi colored shiny and so bad it did not clean up I had to cover the spot on the lawn with soil and hose that down.
ha ha not funny.


 the cover up